Treasuring the moments

In this last general conference, Elder Ballard made the statement that "...the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction."

I don't know why this hit me so very hard. I think that it was because in the weeks preceding, I had been really struggling with the kids and I had noticed a couple of sweet moments here and there, but my thought had been that after all the work I go through, a sweet moment here and there wasn't payment enough. After I heard that comment by Elder Ballard, my attitude towards being a mom has completely changed. Now, I take those moments and thrive off of them.

We've had a long day today. We have had lots of friends over, which is great for keeping Jane entertained. We started with a tea party/picnic this morning. I was helping them pour the "tea" and and came inside, I then heard Jane very enthusiastically say to her friends "I love my mommy." My heart melted at that moment. It felt so good that my little girl was loving me enough to tell her friends about it. I've been living off of that moment all day. We've had some exhaustion and some melt downs and some whining and hitting and screaming, but today, it's all worth it.

I love that little girl. I went to breakfast this morning with some of the women in my ward and it was basically mayhem. I had Jane and Lizzy and Ben and every time I take all of them out with me, people get floored at my courage to do it. It's just the way it has to be sometimes though. My friends are so sweet and I kept getting offers of help, but I just kept telling them that Jane could help me. I never realized until that very moment everything that she does for me. I can't imagine what I would do without her. She can be so difficult, but at the same time, she is so in touch with my needs. Instead of being able to play all the time, she stays at home with me and helps me feed the babies and keep them entertained and get me diapers and bottles and even with all the work I give her, she'd almost always rather play with me than any one else. She doesn't get to have me come play outside as much as she wants and she doesn't get to go on outings very often or ride her scooter or any of the things that kids should be able to do, but she bears it with so much patience. I don't know how I never saw it in her before. Somehow, the moments of joy as a mother can be very fleeting for me, but I'm learning to treasure them.



The tea party. Jane really isn't into photo taking lately. All she wants is to make are "silly faces"



Lizzy isn't any easier to take a photo of. I tried to take some of her for my mom, but she wouldn't even look at the camera and walked away when I tried to get close. This is seriously the best photo I got of her and she's playing peek-a-boo. She thought she was hilarious. She is starting to want more and more attention from "mama" or "rah-rah" (she tries to say Laura, I think it's too funny to stop her at this point) I need to make a full list of words that she says.

I didn't get any photos of Ben today, but he's been such a sweetheart lately. You can read all about him on Leslie's blog, but my two cents is that he's adorable and sweet and he loves to laugh and has turned into a really good napper at my house. If only he didn't mess with the TV so much...

What incredible children I am surrounded with every day! I have to write it down when I feel this way, because the feelings may only last until the next meltdown!
Here's to a long, wonderful day.