Monday, August 4, 2008

Note to self: I don't want to live.

So, please tell me that I'm not the only one who wakes up in the morning with all kinds of ambition and intentions for the day and then somehow, you reach the end of the day and all your ambition has turned into this...














Seriously, how did this happen? Jane never got her hair done today. She got herself dressed in her swimming suit this morning and I never changed her out of it. Lizzy has apparently been eating chocolate cookies that ended up on the floor even though I didn't get them out of the pantry, she has no shirt because she pooed on it earlier today and she's desperately trying to drink chicken broth from a sealed can. Sad. Not to mention all the crackers, cheese and general filth that is ground into my carpet, couch and hardwood floors. Oh, AND I accidentally flushed a rubber ducky down the kids bathroom toilet this morning, not realizing it was buried under the MOUNDS of toilet paper that Lizzy unrolled into it, rendering the brand new Totos in the kid bath and downstairs bath completely out of commission. Fabulous.

I'm not even feeling all that debilitated, like I was yesterday when I was so bad off that I started to think that perhaps 32 weeks wasn't all THAT early for a baby to be born, with modern medicine being what it is, and I'm sure little Charlie would survive in the long run if I went into labor at that moment, ridding me of the misery that I was suffering. At least the hospital can give you a nerve block, but that's a story for another day. Please don't show this post to anyone at child protective services.

Jane found a package of barrettes that I needed to get in the mail today and stabbed it a gazillion times with screws that came from who knows where. When I asked her what happened, she lied to me and told me that Lizzy did it. Then, when I told her I knew she was lying, she said it was her dad. THAT earned her a nice long time out.

I locked the girls in their room until their dad got home to deal with them. I thought it best that we were separated for a while, for their own safety. We then went to dinner at Five Guys Burgers (of which I will bear my testimony later) where Lizzy reacted to something and her face broke out in a rash. Don't even ask me to tell you about bedtime, let's just say that it is now after 10:30 and it barely got quiet. Maybe it would be better if I stopped fighting for my sanity for a while. Being crazy might make my job a bit easier.

10 comments:

Kriss said...

I'm so sorry for your horrific day! Sad thing is that I know exatly how you feel! I'm totally in favor of being crazy, sanity just makes you feel like a failure!!!!

Lynda/Mom said...

Sooooo sorry. You deserve a fabulous day tomorrow just for living through the day. Are you Totos working yet?

Sheri said...

Oh dear Laura...I remember those days well. A box of Cheerios spilled on the floor would stay there all day because why would I want to pick them up 2 or 3 more times- and it made snack time easier! I also remember fondly the day the boys emptied every vhs from every case (probably about 300 of them). I did have to put them all back - no easy task- but it kept them busy for many hours. As long as all are alive and breathing I consider you quite the success! Keep doing what you are doing...no harm done. The messes will never go away...well maybe when you are widowed and living alone. Which sounds more fun? I take the kids and their messes anyday. Loves!

Danielle said...

I wonder if it was the peanuts that made Lizzy's face break out. Oh, and I have recently decided that I am not having children.

Nikkie said...

Sanity is highly overrated-and who gets to decide what sane is anyway?! Your kids are smart, beautiful and well adjusted so forget about the temporary state of the house. And, HELLO! you are 9 months pregnant (practically) so celebrate everything you get accomplished and blow the rest off. Life is too short. BTW, Totos rock!

Allman Roca said...

Once again, I am glad to not be alone in child chaos. I seriously feel your pain!
I started putting Kate's bowl on the floor and dumping her food in it.It all ends up down there anyway.
I was just thinking to myself the other day, "I seriously did this to myself!" We are insane!!!
oh- go get Lizzy allergy tested asap. It is right down the street from your house. And go buy some childrens liquid Zyrtec. We live on the stuff. Call me!!

MaryAnn said...

Looks like a normal day at the Dillard house. I think I stopped having ambition about 6 months ago. Now if I get the kids dressed, myself cleaned up and if we do one fun activity a day I feel like I have had a great day!

Laura Stringham said...

Thanks everyone. It makes me feel a little better to remember that I'm not the only who has these days.

Emily Call said...

Oh, I am so sorry! Days like that are so hard even when not pregnant. Hang in there!

Katie said...

LOVE this post. Love your honesty. Nice to know I'm not the only one with two beautiful girls who have no regard for my to-do list. What are we thinking, adding a third one to the mix??

PS - When you're done bearing your testimony of Five Guys, I will say AMEN!!